Sometimes, it is difficult to remember how well you really have it when things are seemingly going wrong. Just today, I found out that a co-worker of mine may not be with us for much longer. I cannot imagine how this person must feel, knowing that, in a matter of months, they may not be here.
So, when I heard that my nine year old was having a difficult day, I thought-initially-boy, he doesn’t know how great his life really is.
That thought, though, only lasted a few moment…until I heard him on the phone. See, while Preston is not eaten up with cancer, in his mind, at that moment, he may as well be. In my talks with him, and from reading the blog posts of others who are also ‘on the spectrum’, they describe the same thing: the world is, basically, ending for them.
With Preston, getting him calm is paramount and THEN finding out what put him over the edge. It is a delicate and very fine line and, once in a while, we break it and things can get much worse before it gets better.
Today seems to be a little different. I wasn’t home to help him cope and couldn’t really handle it on the phone, so he did the best he could.
When I got home, he was fine. The house was in one piece and his brother was still kicking. All in all, a great outcome.
In talking with him about his bad day, I realized that it isn’t just what happens in the same day, but it could also be from the previous day. Last night, we had Stevi B’s pizza, Sweet Frog and a short cooling down period before bedtime. A lot was crammed into one evening. He also has not had his ‘daddy time’ as he was sick during the time his father would normally have picked him up.
It is the little things like can add up to a major event and sometimes we forget that.
And, context is key. Something I need to keep in mind. Here I was, Concerned and upset over my co-worker’s condition, dismissing what my step son was going through. But, in Preston’s mind, he may as well have been that co-worker.
While I am glad it was good out come for a melt down day, I am heartbroken over my friend..